New Years Eve used to be the biggest night of the year. Something that was planned well in advance with a group of great friends and usually ended up with me walking through the city bare foot because I had decided to wear some ridiculously tall high heels all night, spending what would probably equate to hours waiting in bar queues to drink way too many watered down cocktails from plastic cups, swatting away desperate sweaty guys on a dance floor, followed by being stuck in the middle of the city at 5am with no way to get home because there are no cabs in the city. Not to mention the hideous hang over on new years day when we finally woke up at 2 in the afternoon. But we did this every year, and at the time we loved it. Now, I can't think of anything worse and there is no way that you will get me anywhere near the city for a New Year like that.
Today I am sitting in air conditioned comfort on the couch in my house, wearing a dress that I don't have to worry about whether or not I look fat in, or if I have a VPL, and some sensible shoes. It's just me, Timmy, Archie lazing outside in the sun and Ella, fast asleep in her cot. The beer is cooling in the fridge, we've got salt and pepper prawns ready to be cooked along with other tasty treats and I couldn't be happier. We probably won't even make it to watch the 12 o'clock fireworks, and I'm ok with that.
We tried to think back on this year and things that we have done and achieved and to be honest it was all a bit of a blur. I know we did some great stuff but for the life of me I couldn't remember much. We had a gorgeous baby girl in August, so everything before then seems to have been erased by a tiredness I have never known before and a haze of drunken love.
In the past I have not been good at keeping resolutions. I always get so excited about them at first and I am so motivated but then I get lazy or start procrastinating and it's all down hill from there.
But right now, I am vowing that this year will be different! There, I said it - so it's got to be true right?
I have realised that slowly over the years I have lost my spark for the things I love to do and have gotten tangled and hung up on things that aren't important to me. I feel like I am living a life that lacks purpose and intent. Don't get me wrong - I have a great life but I guess sometimes you realise that you are stuck in a bit of a rut. It's time for me to refocus and get my mojo back. I've created this blog so that I can document our day to day life and all of our adventures and the things that I am so grateful for in my life, as well as documenting all of the milestones that Ella achieves along the way. So next year, when I am being a Nanna on the couch on new years eve again, instead of feeling like another year has just passed me by, I will be able to look back on all the amazing things that our little family have done and experienced and be proud to say that this was the year that I found myself again.
Here's to 2012!
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